Me as a Gestational Carrier!!

** A moment in my Tummy, forever in my heart**

Thank you for visiting my blog! I'm not the best writer so bare with me as I try to tell about my experience :) I am a mom of 4 ranging from ages 13-3. About 12 years ago I decided that one day I would help a family bring a child into this world. In 2011 I met my first Intended family and delivered a baby boy on Aprils fools Day 2012. I now am matched with my second family and I look forward to what this journey brings to us.

Friday, September 23, 2011

Sweet Rolls

I am so sorry for never posting. I have been so tired and I keep starting post but then I fall asleep. And to be honest I thought nobody really reads this.  My blog is just not that fun and all my fun Ideas are to far to reach because I can barely lift my arms. Well I have been yelled at a couple times because somebody wants to read my blog and I am not updating it. I am so sorry to my readers I will get much better. Now that I am almost out of 1st trimester I should feel a little like myself again.

I started writing this, this morning and again had to walk away due to lack of energy.  But I am amazed I didn't take a nap and I feel ok and Im not nauseous!  When I woke up today I started craving sweets. I wanted a sweet roll from Village Baker. Sweets have not been my friend. In fact its made me sicker. But Today I am finally feeling satisfied!

Today I am 11.2 weeks. I can't believe how time is flying. I am getting a little more nervous planning for whats to come. Its more real that I have to deliver this baby. I have a lot of the same fears when I'm pregnant with my own but at the same time these fears are so different. I have an Idea of how delivery will go and my feelings I will have. I really see this beautiful day with lots of emotions but witnessing so many miracles and blessings. I dream of this day often. But I have really had to put myself in a place that it may not go the way I see it. I have to plan for the worst but so hope for the best.

A couple weeks ago my mom and I played on an Ultrasound machine. This baby is getting so big. It was so sweet to see it kicking and punching me.  As I was looking at the Ultrasound I kept trying to understand what I was feeling. I was looking at this baby in MY belly, yet it didn't feel like my belly I was looking at. But I was so excited seeing all the movement and a strong heartbeat.  Then as we got a shot that the baby was waving its sweet little hands at me. I said " oh its waving at aunt Jen" I realized I saw this Ultrasound as if I was aunt Jen or a close friend. I love this baby but I defiantly don't see it as mine. It's been very Interesting feeling these emotions.

The first picture is the waving hand. The second is the spine.